Redneck vasectomy!

[DaveIN]

REDNECK VASECTOMY!

A Kentucky couple, both bona fide rednecks, had 9 children.

They went to the doctor to see about getting the husband 'fixed'.

The doctor gladly started the required procedure
and asked them what finally made them make the decision,
why after nine children, would they choose to do this.

The husband replied that they had read in a recent article
that one out of every ten children being born in the United States was Mexican,
and they didn't want to take a chance on having a Mexican baby
because neither of them could speak Spanish.

dAVE

[DaveIN]

A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop.

The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says,

'OK old fart, time for you to retire.'
The old rooster replies, 'Come on, surely you cannot handle
ALL of these chickens.
Look what it has done to me.
Can't you just let me have the two old hens in the corner?'
The young rooster says,
'Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over.'
The old rooster says,
'I tell you what, young stud....
I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop.'

The young rooster laughs.
'You know you don't stand a chance, old man.
So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start.'

The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap.

He is only 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining fast.

The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by.
The Old Rooster is squawking and running hard as he can.
The Farmer grabs his shotgun and
- BOOM -
He blows the young rooster to bits.

The farmer sadly shakes his head and says,
'Darn It!......
Third gay rooster I bought this month.'

Dave